Funny how that happens

I have a lot of things that make me smile right now.

Life isn't perfect and sometimes it takes a bit of work to remember that smiling is kind of an important part of having a good outlook, even if no one sees you smile.

Who would have thought... Chicago is starting to feel like home. Funny how that happens.


I hadn't truly decided to stay until my interview got cancelled at the beginning of November. Since that time...

I've moved (hopefully the last time for a while)

I've gotten my application into the Coast Guard Auxiliary and now have my weekends starting to look pretty booked.

I've made some closer friends that I met in October

I've met quite a few people outside my normal social circle through that psychology experiment I'm running called match.com since I joined at the beginning of January. Some horrendously awkward coffee and lunch dates so far but it has made me appreciate when someone that matches me well comes along. One in particular is slowly developing and unfolding. I'm excited to see where this continues to go.

I've allowed myself the option to be happy AND not feel guilty. I can't change the past. I can't change mistakes I may have made. I can't stop other people's choices and life changes... and there are more circumstances I can't control. Most of all.. I can't control everything.

And That's OK. .... (yes. Still working on true 150% acceptance of this statement. But slowly. Its my mantra lately).

and I've already posted it here before.. but this picture is what takes me back into the place where I first found balance. I was sitting on a rock in the middle of the river in Vancouver's Lynn Canyon. This is the place that comes to mind when I try to recapture what it felt like when things were right. This is home. And somehow I managed to capture it perfectly.

Where is the time going??

How is it already January 21. I am dumbfounded.

Still in that winter funk. But it is getting better. I took the bus this morning for a change of pace... and saw the Sun rising across the lake as we passed Loyola Park. I have forgotten much I enjoyed seeing the full sunrise every morning. It is too easy to take things for granted.

But that sun rise warmed me right to my toes on this VERY frigid and chilly days. I don't even want to look at a thermometer because it will just be more depressing.

I wish I'd been on the sidewalk so i could have taken a picture.. But this will suffice. It is from a sunrise over the lake last winter.

Lots but not to say

Been a busy couple of weeks. I've moved... again. If anyone is keeping count that is move #4 in chicago in 2 years, and move #7 since Jan 1 2006.

The holidays are over, the gloom is still here. Lights are going down and the grey cold fog is crouching on in. I take my bubble baths with a book almost nightly now.


I've started a blog post here many times over the last couple of weeks, and haven't hit publish. I know moping when I see it, and sometimes I just need to let those days pass without documenting them to embarrass myself later.

This girl and her soul need to get out of the city for a while. I haven't left Chicago since October, and haven't been on the water since October either. I start my Boat Crew class for 15 weeks of Saturdays on Jan 15, so if I want to do something this coming saturday is about my only full weekend from now until May.